Why Don’t We Make the Filthy Immigrants at Least Learn English?

And, in so writing, I join a great American tradition of harassing new arrivals.

What is this, some form of fraternity hazing of Freshman Americans before they’re allowed to join the ranks of “real” Americans?

Personally, I’m willing to “press 1 to proceed in English“, and I don’t wake up in the middle of the night fearful that soon I’ll have to press 2.

9 Responses to “Why Don’t We Make the Filthy Immigrants at Least Learn English?”

  1. Kevin says:

    You weren’t even out the helping glen beck return our country to the path of rightousness today.

  2. les says:

    If you’re not plagiarizing, I expect to see you shortly as a NYT columnist; Ross Douthat, rising young conservative philosophizer, used that venue to claim that the secret to America’s success in assimilating immigrants was consistent harassment and persecution. Again earning him the unofficial nickname, Douchehat.

  3. Nick says:

    Why Don’t We Make the Filthy Immigrants at Least Learn English?

    I can think of several Southwest Asians at my office who a) are remarkably qualified to do so, and b) would be more than happy to work a few nights a week (in addition to their normal day jobs) in order to make your idea happen.

  4. Byron Funkhouser says:

    Why Don’t We Make the Filthy Immigrants at Least Learn English?

    This is always said by people who only speak one language.

  5. gonemild says:

    I hope you all recognize the sarcasm . . .

  6. anon says:

    I would like to read your legal opinion on the 40th District situation.

  7. Mike says:

    It is a hot button issue for a lot of people. For instance:

    http://explorehomeland.org/2010/08/24/language-option-presses-buttons/

  8. gonemild says:

    I know some people think that way, and it’s just depressing that anybody could be so stupid and narrow-minded. I wonder if she would have appreciated an option to speak English if she had traveled through Hermann, Missouri, or Prague, Nebraska or Lindsborg, Kansas a few short generations ago. And it amuses me deeply that the proud English speaker complains that some people aren’t “assimulating”. Perhaps he should be deported to wherever such a word exists.

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